We tend to think, as a society, that technique really only matters to a woman, and that pretty much anything works for a man – just give it a few quick tugs and …oops…see what we mean?
But that’s not true in the slightest, and in fact, we are doing men (and ourselves) a great disservice if we just leave them the basics while us women go in search of the ultimate Nirvana of pleasure and how to get there.
There are many ways that sex and the big ‘O’ can be enhanced for our XY counterparts, and we’re here to show you how.
It’s not a race, and his orgasm will be much more intense if we hang fire with that final thrust. Yes, men want to climax (don’t we all?) but there’s no rush. Take him to just before the crucial moment and then slow things down again. Whether you are manually or orally stimulating him, you’re in control of the movements, so when you feel he’s about to reach his finale, hang back, let things calm down a little, and then repeat. Each time you do this the tension builds a little more, so when you do decide to have mercy and let him orgasm, it will be intense!
Take me to the Ballgame
If you’re with a new partner it can take a while to gauge when the time is right, so to speak, so both the previous suggestion and this one will take practice, but they are so worth it. When a man is about to climax, his testicles will actually rise closer to his body, so give nature a helping hand and gently place the palm of your hand under his balls and press them lightly upwards against his body. This is a great move for making things even more powerful.
Using the Back Door
Many men have a pathological fear of anything going anywhere near their butt, so before you even attempt this you MUST ask his permission. Consent works both ways, so never do anything he’s not comfortable with. But…if he does say yes, it will be worth it because hidden inside, as you probably know, is his prostate, and massaging that can be mind-blowing for a man (and pretty satisfying for a woman). Using plenty of lube, you can either try a finger or a small vibe or dildo, gently slide it inside and…well…play around a bit. If you get the timing right, and you can do this while he’s climaxing, he’ll be delirious with sexual excitement.
Oftentimes, both men and women will orgasm with their eyes closed, head back, and oblivious to anything and everything else. But you can add a certain frisson and eroticism to the whole thing by looking into each other’s eyes as you climax. Seeing those emotions playing out in front of you can be incredibly erotic. Another way to add intimacy is to kiss while one or both of you are orgasming – a deep, sensual kiss can add a whole other layer to what is already an awesome feeling. And if you can manage it, do both.
Piggy in the Middle
There’s a space between the penis and the anus called the perineum, and this little area is a goldmine for men’s orgasms. Perfect for during both manual and oral stimulation, just applying some pressure to it will make things much more explosive for him, and has even been known to result in multiple orgasms for a man, because yes…they can have them too. Alternatively, since it is oh so sensitive, including it in your oral repertoire (i.e. licking it, or tickling it with your tongue) can send him over the edge.
As we come closer to orgasm, our breathing naturally quickens. But take a tip from Tantra…slow your breathing right down, and try to match the others’ breath. Not only is this a very intimate thing to do, especially if paired with eye to eye contact, but it also increases the flow of oxygen to the genitals, making an orgasm even more intense.
Sex should never be a race to the finishing line, and taking the time to make things more pleasurable for your partner will pay dividends for you because there are few things more stimulating than seeing your lover in the throes of ecstasy that you have created.